by w@dmind | Aug 31, 2017 | Uncategorized
When you first rise in the morning tell yourself: I will encounter busybodies, ingrates, egomaniacs, liars, envy-mongers, and cranks.” —Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 2.1
Sounds like Monday morning was as rough two thousand years ago as it is today. Marcus Aurelius was Emperor of Rome from 161 to 180. He was also a practitioner of stoicism.
Stoicism, in a nutshell, is dealing with hardship, pain or troubles without complaint.
We all know that guy or gal; The person who just seems to be able to deal with everything life throws at them with a calmness and peace that seems unworldly (and completely unlike us – well, me – who falls apart at the slightest hint of a problem, usually daily.)
And, not only can these stoics deal with the slings and arrows flying their way, they have another superpower: They “spin” the problem to their advantage and actually embrace the obstacle. They see the opportunity in the very disaster that sends us lesser mortals running in a panic.
So, what’s the secrete? How do we achieve that peaceful state of mind?
One word: Perspective.
Ryan Holiday is an author and media strategist. He also is a huge proponent of stoicism and has a blog called The Daily Stoic.
In his book, The Obstacle Is The Way, Holiday writes extensively about perspective. He says: “We choose how we look at things. We retain the ability to inject perspective into a situation. We can’t change the obstacles themselves – that part of the equation is set – but the power of perspective can change how the obstacles appear.”
In other words, WE decide how we feel about a situation. There is great power in that.
So. Let’s think good thoughts. Our troubles are what they are; but how we react and deal with them is up to us. Because as William Shakespeare said: “There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so.”
Thanks for reading so far. I really appreciate it. If you know anyone who might like these blog posts, just send me a note – Green link – and I will be delighted to add them to the list.
Have a great rest of the week!
Dr. Dave
by w@dmind | Aug 31, 2017 | Uncategorized
My son has a pair of nasty blue shorts he calls his “energy shorts.”
I don’t know how this started, but (he claims) when he puts them on it gives him Great Energy that requires him to run around and ping off the walls like an idiot… which he is… because he’s 11.
I have been thinking a lot about energy lately, and if you have been in to see me you are probably sick of hearing about it.
Here is a bit of physics: (now hang with me, I am not going to get all college math on you. I don’t like that stuff either.)
The first law of thermodynamics, also known as Law of Conservation of Energy, states that energy can neither be created nor destroyed; energycan only be transferred or changed from one form to another.
If this is true; then why do we “run out of energy?” If energy cannot be created nor destroyed we can’t run out of energy.
We all know if we don’t get enough sleep, eat right and manage our stress we have “less energy” the next day. Don’t believe me? Stay up until 2 AM, drink a two-liter jug of Mountain Dew, eat a bag of Doritos and a box of donuts and lets see how zippy you feel in the morning.
So where did all your energy go? Well, maybe it didn’t go anywhere. Maybe it just changed forms. After all, the law states that energy can change forms. So maybe it changed from a positive, well-rested and optimistic type of energy to a negative, over-tired and pessimistic type of energy. It’s still there, it’s just not in the form that is most beneficial to us.
Scott Adams is a cartoonist and the creator of Dilbert. He also has written a number of books. He is a man of strong opinions (check out his blog) and I don’t agree with everything writes. But I do like what he has to say about energy.
From his book How to fail at pretty much everything and still win big; Adams writes: “Energy is a simple word that captures a mind-boggling array of complicated happenings. For our purposes I’ll define your personal energy as anything that gives you a positive lift, either mentally or physically.”
I tend to agree with Adams. Particularly when he talks about energy killers. You know, those activities or events that instantly make you feel exhausted. For me, it’s clothes shopping (a painful event that makes me want to go lie down in the car.) My wife, on the other hand, seems to get energized when she is prowling the mall. This is dangerous on a number of levels – mostly money related.
So what do we do here? Every day we are pushed and pulled from the moment we get up until we go to bed. Our energy is under constant assault.
Adams says, “The way I approach the problem of multiple priorities is by focusing on one main metric: my energy. I make choices to maximize my personal energy because that makes it easier to manage all of the other priorities.”
In other words; pick and choose. Avoiding, as much as we can, those things that transform our energy from the good stuff to the bad stuff is not selfish. (and we instinctively know what those things are) It’s a way of living a happier, healthier, and more energetic life.
Thanks for reading along so far. I really appreciate it and I would love your comments and thoughts on energy. If you know anyone who might like to get these blog posts, just click the green link below and I would love to add them to the list.
Dr. Dave
by w@dmind | Aug 31, 2017 | Uncategorized
I really did say that to Mary. The thing about having a rotten weekend.
OK. Here’s the deal. I don’t want any of you to have a bad weekend. It’s just that we are going to Arizona to visit my folks for a few days and I want the weather to be beautiful there.
Now the cruel flip side, is that while I am gone, I really want the weather to nasty here… and I feel kind of bad about that.
Why is that? Why do we (you can admit it!) get that little lift of pleasure when something goes wrong for someone else.
We have all watched celebrities, politicians and religious leaders go off the rails and over the cliff with a certain amount of satisfaction. There is a weird thrill in watching a slow moving train wreck. After all, isn’t that really the whole purpose of reality TV?
Christine Grimaldi has a great article about Schadenfreude in the themorningnews.org titled I’m Glad I’m Not You.
In her piece, she quotes John Portmann, University of Virginia professor and author of When Bad Things Happen to Other People. The German word schadenfreude is pieced together from two others—freude, the plural of joy, and schaden, the plural of shame or pity. “It’s literally joys that come from sorrows or sufferings.”
However, Grimaldi also goes on to say, “What I find interesting is that no such word or phrase exists in American English. (Whether the word “epicaricacy,” which has Greek roots, qualifies is subject to debate.) Certainly, there is no piecing together “shame” and “joy” to make “shamejoy,” as in German. Shame and joy are antithetical, distant, never meant to share the same bed.”
“That’s because schadenfreude does not square with America’s national obsession with the comeback story. Sure, we snicker along with the rest of the world when others stumble, but our culture is built on possibility. Here, the harder you fall, the greater the potential to get the hell back up—at least in theory.”
So maybe I’m being un-American when I hope the weather is bad here while I am lying by the pool there. Un-American? That’s pretty strong for just hoping for a little wind and rain!
So because I am a Good American, I hope you all have a great weekend!
(Especially Mary!) And I really hope you have Great Weather while I am gone. And I will be back in the office on Wednesday morning…which is all I was trying to say anyway. (Other than I am going to work on that schadenfreude thing.)
*** Side note: Forecast for Fargo this weekend calls for close to 50 degrees with some sun. Not too bad. ***
Thanks for reading so far. I really appreciate it! If you know anyone who would like to receive these posts, just click the green link below and send me an email.
Dr. Dave
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